if i was famous i would just knock on peoples doors and be like hello yes its me
my ex got mad on facebook when he found out i was seeing someone else and he wrote “i hope he likes your loose pussy” so i commented back and wrote “my vagina is a muscle that will go back to the same size after sex. your penis will never get any bigger.” and now he is messaging me saying “delete that comment now”
*loses a follower*
*checks fave mutuals*
yeah ok whatever later nerd
Authors these days don’t know about happy endings.
"I like to think I’m helping them by hating them."